Review: ‘Cooties’ Is Quirky, Violent, and Funny







Total Score

User Rating
no ratings yet


Posted September 18, 2015 by

Full Article

A zombie horror-comedy movie, ‘Cooties’ looks to take a subject that’s saturating the market right now and try to give it a fresh spin. Growing up, we all would choose at least one person a day to tell everyone they had cooties. No one was really sure what cooties were, you just knew that you didn’t want that person touching you until someone else was accused of having them. What if cooties was actually a zombie virus though? And avoiding that person’s touch was more running away from a blood-thirsty monster than it was just sitting a few chairs away from them? Pitting teachers against students, grownups against children, Cooties has a lot of hilarious and violent moments that blend seamlessly together to create a fun and creative film.

When Clint (Wood) leaves New York behind and returns to his hometown of Fort Chicken in order to get alone time to finish his novel, he picks up a substitute teaching job at the local grade school to make ends meet. While his co-workers seem to be jaded by the job, Clint is full of excitement at what this new path in life has in store for him. What he soon finds out though is that kids these days are heavily distracted, say things no kid should say, and overall are just complete assholes. When a young girl who seems to be very sick attacks the loudmouth in class, Clint thinks it’s nothing more than instant karma; it turns out, however, to be the beginning of a virus that turns young kids into flesh eating creatures. Alongside the other teachers, Clint must find a way to escape the school without getting torn limb from limb and hopefully warn everyone else about what’s going on.


‘Cooties’ is a film that relies on its oddball sense of humor and over-the-top violence.While it appealed to me, I could see why some just might not get it. The characters all border on being a little too odd without completely crossing the line and you either enjoy their quirks or they drive you crazy for an hour and a half. No matter how you feel, one thing is for certain: Wilson as the machismo exuding Phys-Ed teacher, Wade, steals the show as he turns in his best character since Dwight in ‘The Office’. Wade means well but he seems to always be striving for that extra manliness even if it’s at his own peril. When the outbreak is happening on the playground, Wade is in the corner yelling at himself to do better as his basketball shooting leaves a lot to be desired.

While Wilson’s and Wood’s characters seems to be completely fleshed out and feel authentic, that can’t be said for the rest of them. Not that the writing is bad or the acting lets you down, they just simply don’t have enough screen time to match the charisma and energy of the former two. What that leaves you with is two people you’re interested in for the whole movie, and a supporting cast that will make you laugh but you find yourself wondering what they’re really doing there. Jorge Garcia’s character, for example, is a lot of fun and has some pretty comedic moments, but in the overall narrative he seems to be forced in there just to add a few extra jokes. It doesn’t ruin the movie by any means, but it does keep it from being as good as it could have been.

Despite leaning more to the comedy side of things, the film does a great job at adding a fresh take on this whole zombie craze. When they easily could have gone a safer, more conventional, route, the creators of this film took a risk and succeeded. One thing is for sure: you will have a damn good time watching this movie.





Be the first to comment!

Leave a Response